That's the last time I fill my pockets with sushi.
I need to stop hooking up with boys in my major. three boys in one class is just a litttle too awkward.
It is 8 o'clock in the morning and there is already blood all over one of the stalls in the bathroom. What has your St. Patrick's day done for you?
She said I walked up to the McDonalds counter and ordered just a cup full of pickles then proceeded to offer some to everyone in the place.
do you really not remember him getting up at like 4am with a leaf blower running through the house and telling people to "WAKE THE FUCK UPPP"
This must be what defeat feels like to Tom Brady today. I bet he wishes he could barf up all of his bad decisions from yesterday, too.
It took me half an hour to realize I didnt know them
Nah I think he's a bit weirded out I worked out where he lives from a Facebook photo
ayo
its like you know when i get waxed
I used the line "you don't have enough pillows". Then left. Thought you should know.
Does sweetest day count when you're spending it with your fuck buddy, high and eating Pizza Hut?
Im so sorry for peeing on your chest.
Once again I let my vagina make the decisions...that and vodka :(
not even sure this counts as hungover but like my body can't exist in reality today
That 2-CB was ass.
You mean the asprin cut with pez?
Randomize
