He keeps looking? I tried to shag. I invited him to this table but he went to ze other one! If he shaves his 'tache I would totally hit it.
yeah my walk of shame consisted of driving on the wrong side of the road at 6am still drunk with cum drying in my hair and left eye.
Stripper fight on main stage. It just happened. And it was glorious.
It feels like Jesus smacked me in the face with the new testament for drinking so much last night
I feel like I would bang a guy with a dick piercing just to say I have...like climbing a huge mountain or somethig
I hope, cuz I was gunna get "celebritory drunk" but now I have to get "I'm disappointed drunk"
i have no feeling in my penis or fingers but i think it was worth it
Not rlly sure. Might just drink and sleep. Gotta wake up for my last rabies shot lol
I couldn't tell if they ere dancing or fucking but they won the costume contest
i was in burrito mode and too drunk to move. no fucks were given. none.
I'm far too poor to be letting my hookups wear my shirts home. I'm down to about a total of 8 shirts and have no intention of buying more
The Wolf of Wall Street “I ain’t fuckin’ leaving!” speech when the cops broke up your party though...
He looks like an accountant with a secret kinky candy filled center.
Turns out that Irishman put my panties under his pillow afterward. Thanks?
I was so close to going to get my nipples pierced with my mom today
Randomize
