yes i saw that this morning. it was my mailbox.
the Monday before Thanksgiving is not a Monday at all. Just Thursday in Monday suit.
I hate the hobo that sits outside our building
Joe or Chris?
do i even wanna kno y u kno their names?
well i came home drunk one night and Chris offered me a beer as i was coming in, it was kinda weird but i wasn't goin to deny a free beer. you're proolly talkin about Joe though, he's the one with the fucked up eye.
He considered it romantic when he told me mid-blow job that no matter what happens, he will "never forget how good of a dick I suck". Verbatim.
wine lets you be on time to class apparently
This is a dangerous realization
I forgot if I was chewing my gum or my tongue
I WILL PAPERCUT YOUR URETHRA YOU DO NOT STEAL A MANS SECOND BIG MAC
I was wearing my get used bookstore shirt when we fucked. Ironic yet appropriate.
I'm not gonna lie. The thing I miss the most about him right now is the air conditioned hotel rooms.
Fucking holidays. How do I have this many men who want to fuck me and none of them are available when I'm ready to blow my top?
I tolerate his mediocre drunk sex for the mind blowing morning sex. More than worth it.
I'm spending my Sunday wishing the entire Patriots offense would let me touch their manhood
you're welcome to come here, except my beds from ikea so it's more unstable than i am
It was hands down the most magical fuck I've ever had
It was the only fuck you've ever had..
You ripped his router out of the wall and screamed "I have defeated the matrix"
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