Lets drop out of school and be professionally skinny and drunk
last week i woke up at this guys house...this week i woke up at his ex girlfriends
I was speaking french the whole night. Until i got arrested. Then I decided I should probably start speaking English.
What's the point in getting all dressed up and going when i'm just gonna throw up on myself by midnight?
My fave moment of today was you sitting in a hot pink innertube puking into the ocean in front of a lot of children. i would have held your hair back but the ocean did it for you.
I just found puke in my bra..
After she saw a msg in his phone from me that listed the reasons why I love his cock, I don't think I can deny fucking her ex.
Im going to make a sandwich and see if my books came from amazon. I cant believe two years ago i was dating eight guys and teaching russian exchange students how to do shots.
Three Architectural classes: $990.00 Architectural supplies: $300.00 Changing majors and using my architectural supplies to roll blunts: Priceless
I feel like I hate him but his dick too bomb to hate completely
I AM BEING ACCOSTED BY A HUMMING BIRD
I AM IN MILD DISTRESS
I think I fell asleep on my pizza last night. Damn, I am sauccccy.
I can’t tonight. I’ve got to see about a penis
Remember how I was complaining about how no guy has ever gotten me off?
Every time I look at him 'Relax' by Frankie Goes to Hollywood plays in my head. Is that weird?
Randomize