Why do girls always cry at the bar?
What's the point of going out if you're going to cry all night?
Are they having an exestensial crisis at the bar?
I think I left something in your back seat.... It was my integrity
I think I tried picking up these girls last night by asking them what their favorite color was...I obviously woke up alone
I just saw my grandmother naked. again. this needs to stop now.
he's mad because you were 'slandering his penis'.
I don't know what's worse, the fact that my parents own a sex swing or the fact that my little cousin was playing on it
I need to sleep with 3 more guys by midnight to meet my 2010 resolution..
Is there a word for someone who only has sex with NFL prospects?
Hint of advice dont get with minor league baseball players, you can google their stats but not their stds.
Yeah just got a blowjob at busch stadium during the cardinals game childhood dream realized
I'd bet your vomit would be flammable at this point. Can I try to light it?
We wouldn't be friends if you didn't.
do you remember when we thought we were both knocked up by the same guy like two days apart and would have half twins? Thats a best friend moment.
She is the epitome of a puke & rally. She picked a random hott guy at the bar & made him pinky promise not to leave while she took a power nap. She went & passed out in her friends car & apparently puked just outside the bar. She stumbled in & found the randome guy again & claimed she was golden. Made it to the after party & stayed up til 6 doing body shots off every girl she saw & hooked up with the random from the bar. I love her life
I think I just got suckerpunched by a 14-year-old.
I remember yelling at him telling him that the strippers were "nice people."
Randomize
