His vagina is bleeding blood all over the court
hey its robert, we just made out in the backyeard. i'm inside now and you should come to the bathroom and meet me.
Is masturbating to pics of your ex on Facebook considered cheating?
You are proof that most things are best left unsaid.
They should make Glad Forceflex condoms.
just watched paranormal activity stoned. laughed the whole time and screamed when they turned on the lights. eating doritos. I love my life
I wish the ER had shaved that part of my head. It would be easier to show people my staples at the bar.
She called to say she's single and blow job season is back.
he tried to do a one handed cartwheel to showoff but knocked himself out cold. fuckin jagerbombs will kill that man.
I'm thinking about wearing a strap-on just to freak him out the next time he pulls my pants off.
I'm on this new diet called "I have 10$ till next Friday, I have rice
I'm dressed in all sequins still at 9:30 in the morning and the worst part is that I actually still fit in in Vegas
Noo.... Like in the attic of a crack house with nitrous and fat chicks weird....
The only times we have to apologize in this friendship is when you intentionally punch me and that's only happened once so it's okay
His dick is the size of my forearm. Would it be rude to ask to take a comparison photo after sex?
We watched ESPN, hooked up, got waffles. You know, a typical weekend.
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