i didnt know what to say other then wrong hole.....after that the moment was ruined.
new years resolution: more sex, less car punching, more chipotle.
a lot of self evaluation comes after you have to clean up a trashcan of your own vomit and condoms
Watching Blossom reruns on YouTube. Eating Pringles dipped in hot chocolate. Not taking this breakup well.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
She insisted on fucking on the futon mattress on the floor, answered the phone call from her boyfriend who was on his way to pick her up, and then had the audacity to ask if I was clean
Just pulled back my covers. Jizz. Jizz everywhere. Hipster jizz everywhere on my only set of sheets.
This was my thought process as I drunkenly ran home: Whoa! I'm going so FAST! Why don't I run EVERYWHERE! ALL THE TIME! Then I peed in a bush and passed out on the ground.
So basically you were a dog.
yeah its nbd she just bit me in the face. be there soon
I'm stealing this baby.
Well I always support illegal activity but where would you put it?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I can already see the regret in her eyes. Amazing night. This city rules.
He was having Sex and you yelled 'hot and dangerous!" and he responded with "if you're one of us then roll with us!" when he went to he bathroom I saw her getting dressed, looking mortified.
I hope you get stoned and think that you're a seal in shark infested waters
She was dressed as a banana and told me that I needed more potassium in my diet. Of course I went down on her.
Just paid for my STD meds using a giftcard I got for Christmas. Thanks mom.
Wow. Ok who would waste Game 7 ticket on kids?!
Poor parenting at its best
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