Just farted cum and thought I shit myself. Crisis averted tho
So it turns out there are pros and cons to having a broken wrist. Pro: I can give amazing blowjobs with my left hand. Con: I just had to open a packet of crisps with scissors.
I'm sorry. Both for you two breaking up and because I just ate some of your cheez it's.
Forgot to mention there might be a picture of me being thrown in the air while at a Mexican restaurant
Uhh, there's a legit bruise on my boob.. Again how does he manage this
and it seems i've caught your masturbating bug. thanks.
Holding a cold bottle of mikes hard lemonade against my pulverized taint....this is my Sunday night
Cleaning my pipe and using the left over resin solution to make THC laced rolling papers and a jar of hash oil/honey for my tea
WE USE THE WHOLE BUFFALO
Prob because you've thrown up alot. As long as its not like pure blood you're fine. Drink water.
Well pulled into the driveway, and there she was. Kinda like a Vegas version of the mint on a pillow
If I am telling you about the details of the shits I take I probably don't want to have sex with you. Probably.
Girl re-adjusts bra, no one bats an eye. I re-adjust nuts, everyone stares.
If he would've shaved his beard when we first broke up, getting over him would've been so much simpler. That asshole.
Blacked out and Irish exited last night. At dinner. On a Sunday.
Also I like oatmeal more than sex.
Randomize
