Just got my rental car in Iowa...gas is under 2 dollars in des moines...this is not a real state
Dude someone changed all the contacts in my phone to I Like Eggs
He saved me in his phone as Easy Jen. Should I be offended?
I wouldn't worry about it. He has me as "Sex Puppet."
So we sucessfully lit our bathtub on fire. Thought you should know.
Chasing tequila with honey. Ill let you know how it turns out.
I decided they need a food cart that just roams around the library like the cotton candy people at the circus. But with real food. like tacos cause it sounds delicious.
I let him watch sportscenter while we fucked. How did he repay me? I'm now missing class to get a shot in the ass for the clap. You and I are getting wasted and keying someone's car this weekend.
He just got dropped off drinking a flask, sitting on the handlebars of a chinese delivery man's bike
Tonight's gonna be epic. Did he bring my noodles?
I just used a VHS tape as a plate for sanwich
bought even stevens on dvd and enough weed and pizza bagels to last us a week.. ready to get snowed in?
ROB LOWE. SO BEAUTIFUL. SO DOUCHEY. SO HARD TO SPELL HIS NAME WHEN DRUNK.
The only good thing about the sex was that he finally cracked the spot on my back that's been hurting.
YOU HAVE TO STOP TELLING BARTENDERS WE DON'T HAVE MORAL STANDARDS
I just got promised sex at a fire station tonight so basically all my porn star dreams are coming true.
Fun fact: I came home from the riverboat without my panties. And woke up with a different pair on.
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