I went out, and slept with my sunglasses on
He better hope I dont die soon. Because I would haunt his bitch ass and cock block 24/7
i think i am going to devote my summer to making my cats internet celebrities
If for no other reason than to cuddle with that puppy, you have to hook up with him again.
We stared down the barrel of pure insanity, took more and the electric elephant god rewarded our fearlessness by giving me golden skulls and naked women crawling out of the walls. I love acid
High as shit. I just described caramel syrup on crackers to my mom for 15 minutes...
You tired to make us "vodka tacos". Which was just you dipping pitas in vodka.
Any good?
Well. FUCK YA. But that's beside the point
All I see when I think of you are dancing penis angels around your head.
Mom and I are both drunk and walking around the Strip. It's like the hangover but with a lot more bathroom breaks.
just shotgunning some tallboys in the cooler, you?
HOW DO YOU GET RAISES EVERY TWO WEEKS?!
Don't drink and shop. I went for happy hour and came home with a fog machine. I now have no other choice but to scare the shit out of my neighbors with it.
I can't believe that after 9 years of signing things as "BATMAN", the first place to turn it down was the liquor store down the block.
Sorry. We had to leave because I knocked a guy out for saying "yolo".
So, if you were also having sex around 11pm, then we were legitimately being penetrated at the exact same time. That is amazing. We are soul sisters.
But I only have 2 emotions angry and horny
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