the couple across the street's about to bang. go get the popcorn and come join us.
dibs on John Mayer's hood pass
A guy with no shirt on and a eyepatch just got out of the car beside me. After he slammed his door into mine. This is our hometown.
I'd like to introduce you to my friend, Moderation. Enjoy each other's company this weekend.
Your friend and I already don't get along
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Plans for halloween need to outrank Caesar, Cleopatra and Mark Antony's threesome...just saying
Honestly the war on drugs is dumb and you can just sleep in my bed which is mega comfortable anytime you want. There I said it
Jacob lost his virginity in a threesome. I am deffs fucking this kid.
DURING A THUNDERSTORM ON HIS BIRTHDAY.
She hash-tagged my name. I think it's safe to say that she remembers our hookup.
and here comes the time of my day when I haw to convince a guy to drive my cape and my handle to my dorm.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Drunkness level: fluent in olde norse
I should not be so motivated by a penis, but I am
Blood work from physical was all good, apparently heavy alcohol use agrees with me
Another beautiful Sunday, another beautiful day the stick is not positive. Amen.
I can't have my last hookup before 21 have been behind a dumpster
They just canceled the season. It’s going to be harder to bang soccer moms this year
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