But if ***** wants to get filthy... Tell her to throw a text my way ;)
Just seen on a tshirt : "fake titties taste funny"
I feel kinda awkward using the Sesame Street themed Google to search for hot young pussy...
There's a girl sitting in front of me making a PowerPoint on Jack Bauer.
She had to get her inhaler in the middle of fucking...but she kept it in.
she's not going to take you seriously with an empty 40 and a sombrero on your head.
He once got bit in the face by a dog and still got laid the same night. He owns Memorial Day Weekend
Is it bad that my only regret is fucking on the bathroom floor and not the sink?
It's def pee. WHY DO I PEE ON THINGS WHEN I DRINK TEQUILA
my night stand is a mini fridge, dont even try to get on my level of laziness.
No. There is no way we have to stoop so low as to ask your dad for weed. There has to be an alternative.
WHAT KIND OF DEALER ONLY WORKS FRI-SUN???
Ours, apparently.
We walking to the game and some random guy came up to to me and yelled "hey you're the whiskey guy!" And then high fived me then walked away
MAGGIE IS ON MY COUCH PETTING AN HONEST TO CHRIST ARMADILLO AND SOBBING INTO HOT CHOCHOLATE. WHAT THE FUCK DID YOU DO TO HER.
I also guarantee you multiple orgasams and blueberry pancakes
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