I feel like I'm in dance class right now
Goodnight my chunky, little, marshmallow muncher
it tastes like there's a party in my mouth and everyone is throwing up
i wish my apartment had room service that i didn't have to pay for.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
good luck with ur interview. Just show them your confidence and don't make that sucking snot noise. Really don't. Praying for you, love mom
He asked if I was on the pill, apparently I just downed my glass of beer and winked at him...
if you hear someone banging on your door early in the morning, it's me with some breakfast burritos, so don't be alarmed
Medicore although I woke up with the business card of a Turkish lawyer called Mufasa...
She wasn't to happy when she went to put her shirt on and it was covered in cum I just looked at her and said collateral damage....
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
if I open my eyes, my head will explode. that hungover.
Id fuck him but only at his house and he had to stay im bed till i left. He only works upper body. It just creeps me out how tiny his legs are
Siri makes being stoned even easier. I don't even Have to type my texts myself
Though I typed a half of that one
it's all fun and games til I text you in last nights clothes with a head bleed
Most desperate stoner moment; dropped our hard earned resin ball in the sand, rinsed it off and then did knife hits in the kitchen cuz we broke our only pipe
Did you see her happy birthday to emily on facebook? The gist of it is like: hey emily you almost died at birth im glad you didn't. love mom.
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