WHO ATE OUR COOKIES WHAT THE FUCK THOSE WERE GOURMET
Worst PDA I've ever seen. She even licked the mustard off his mustach
I know this request is pointless but you two please try to keep the drinking and drug use to a minimal, I have bail money so write my number on your arm and a "if found call", wear a life jacket and act like a responsible 28 year old please.
no you went to jail because you don't know how to whisper when offering a cop a blow job. I'm sure him having a chick partner didn't help.
If she doesn't judge me for bringing my vibrator in the tanning bed, I know she is a true friend.
he suggested we do it doggy style cuz it was his dead dogs birthday...i had to do it
Even completely stoned shes amazing on the piano. There are like 7 people sitting on the ground listening to her like she's the messiah.
In the world of sexual, erotic texting, you rank somewhere between "how much teeth do you want" and "how dry do you want it"
Hypothetically speaking, when I get a sugar glider would it be frowned upon to bring it Ito classes with me in m pocket?
We're ordering chinese food so if you want to get on this obesity train answer me now.
I had a dream last night that I used a condom when I had sex. That's how I knew it was a dream
We kept having to tell you that you couldn't just sit wherever you wanted at Walmart. Sitting in the middle of the raw meat section was unacceptable and children were staring at you.
someone found a bottle of whiskey in the bushes this morning when they were cleaning before an admissions event. i'm 95% sure it's mine..
Let's not forget that we had sex on the ground in public tonight.
He sent me the milestone first dick pic this morning, it looked like a baby's fist holding a tree trunk. I'm frightened and aroused in equal measure.
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