All was going smooth until he pulled a condom out of his collection he kept in a Cheesy Gordita Crunch Box from Taco Bell.
if that dog is afraid of alcohol then he's no dog of mine
He was making tequila spiked Arnold Palmers and murmuring things in Spanish.
I love foreign exchange students.
And then she banged "the first Italian rapper"
I just made my roommate a 'Hope you don't have chlamydia' cake.
Make one for john too.
You need to stop having girl talk with the guys I'm sleeping with.
Just because he told you it was safe doesn't mean you should have licked it.
You're right. I woke up today with my ugly sweater still on and no pants. I'd say it was a successful night.
I think it's safe to assume that dad heard you lose your lesbian virginity last night
I love everything about him! His penis, his hair, his tattoos, his penis, his cat, his penis.
You've changed since you got that strap on
Today some guy at work told me I had the nicest hair he's ever seen and my response was "thanks I grew it myself". This is why I'm single.
I think people are normalizing furries
You date? I thought you just hooked up with your TAs
My nipples are YOUNG and they need TWISTING
Randomize
