is it bad if I use the term bowl as a measurement of time, as in how long it takes to smoke a bowl?
do herpes really smell.
i feel like a lion cub that has been breast fed for years, and mom has left, and now i have to learn how to hunt on my own
On a side note, I now know what a $150 cab ride looks like
According to last night if you on the sidewalk at 12 a|m\nYour a WHORE !
I don't want to talk about it but I will say, that was the best two headed $68 blowjob. Ever.
Just so you know there's a random man downstairs knocking on a door with a dozen roses and a 30 pack of beer. Unattractive or not, I'm inviting him in.
I showed that dick picture that your date texted you to everyone because you passed out and left your phone unattended. Your fault. Plus his cock was big so his fault too.
I knew you would eventually ask my secret. Pedialite mix drinks. Works wonders.
Some kid just stopped wherever he was walking, turned to me, and gave me a slow clap. So I'm pretty sure my walk of shame beats yours.
I didn't have toilet paper until 20 minutes ago. But I have champagne. Priorities.
and if planning a fake elopement keeps me from fucking strangers and doing drugs, i think it's good for me
I found her face down on the kitchen floor asking anybody who walked by for Kraft Dinner
Good luck. While you're suffocating on a dick, I'll be eating pizza rolls. Being a good girl.
1. I drank goldschlager 2. I fell in a bathtub and hit my head (hard) on a soap dish. 2. I sat in said bathtub talking to a random stranger on vacation from wyoming (who i met at a 711 looking for taquitos) for almost an hour. 3. We got kicked out of said bathtub by owner of bathtub. 4. We had sex.
Randomize
