Sorry about all the noise last night. We were trying to break bottles by kicking soccer balls at them. If it's any consolation, there's shattered glass and blood all over my kitchen.
I think he just gave me the 'I used to fuck your sister' discount
So... he formspringed me a link to every nude pic ive taken since he 8th grade. ive evolved nicely. but im nervous as to how this a website.
I can't believe i facilitated a beer for sweater vest deal last night...
I got to see some gay bartender let a girl with daddy issues whip Travis in the balls with his own belt. Totally worth it.
I'm starting to think I didn't bring enough liquor for this family Christmas.
It's 2 pm....
I've had three separate encounters with cops in the last 9 hours.... In two different states
Security deposit gone.
burned down garage with fireworks.
Had an orgasm and got a charley horse at the same time. It was a multi-purpose scream.
Just wore the promise ring dad gave me freshman year of high school as a fake wedding band while I bought a pregnancy test. I think it's safe to say that's not what he had in mind with that gift 14 years ago.
Sex in a tree, bucket list CHECK!
Can I get high for this class every tuesday? Its like a multi-sensory carnival acid trip.
I just got promised sex at a fire station tonight so basically all my porn star dreams are coming true.
I told him we can’t see each other today because absence makes the heart grow fonder but mostly I just need to rest my vag
when some dude came up to you and said he didn't like your shirt you just looked at him and firmly asked if he really thought that you gave a fuck.
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