I'm fascinated by her cleavage. She has deep cleavage, but no obvious boobage to speak of. Check it out.
Me too. I'd like to spend all next summer high and drunk and riding ponies and boys.
Remeber, hes got nothing better to offer you than drunk words and hairy balls.
woke up and she was making me crepes. definitely not the last time i fuck a culinary student
I just realized last night I drunk-bought a flight to Florida for this weekend...kinda torn between the price and the potential of awesomeness
I still think it's messed up that you're naming your kids after all the guys you slept with in college
just had to make the 420 edibles gluten free and kosher for passover.
It's not meant to be. I also just shot a turkey baster of gin into Nate's eye, so....
I don't know what possessed you to do that, but you have to give the stripper more money before you try to check her oil or they are going to throw us out every time you do that.
Do me a favor. Next time I think it's a good idea to take pulls from the handle, yell "FALCON PUNCH" and uppercut me in the taint. My future liver thanks you.
She's the worst person, but the best naked person
Can I come over? I respect you, but I want disrespectful things to happen
I'm pretty sure I said "this might be the last time I'm in here" but then I took his pants off so that's a mixed message
THE EAGLE HAS MY PANTIES. I REPEAT. THE FUCKING MASCOT HAS MY PANTIES.
HOLY SHIT. You're my hero.
last night you told me I had a dark, salty butthole
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