I've been awake for 20+ hrs. What does that mean? I just realized if BSB were Twilight characters, Brian would be Jake and Howie would be Edward based on the video for "Everybody". That's unsettling.
It's unsettling that you took the time to think about that.
I thought short asians scared me, however seeing my first tall asian I'm terrified.
I'm like 99% sure I made out with Kevin Spacey last night. Not good.
My head weighs 7 pounds. i know this because i spent the majority of the night passed out in the bathroom, using the scale as a pillow.
Do you know how hard it is to get cum out of a straw hat!?
Speaking is such a hard concept right now
How bad is it if you swallow a really small piece of glass? Be optimistic if possible I'm anxious about it.
Every time I there's a break up, I'm left with an animal. That's it. No more mutual pets.
I like to think it's an accomplishment that I can relate my life to a T-pain song
You showed up at my front door in a bikini with a fifth of tequila it was like the opening to a porno
Have you ever eaten pizza and gotten your dick sucked at the same time? Because I have pizza.
idk i was trying to watch Fuller House and you got up out of a dead sleep, just in your boxers, said "no more Dave Coulier" and walked out to the living room and unplugged the router
I just need some of your time and all of your body.
What, so now you are his nutritionist and his fuck buddy?
Why is the turtle in the toilet again?
Well as I was puking in the tub I put him in there to keep me company but I am almost positive the original setup was him in the tub and me next to the toilet...I hope he likes tequila
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