you want to go make fun of the strippers on try out night
i got kicked out last time for laughing
the best thing about tacos is after you shit them all out you feel like to have room for your dignity to come back
I will show your tits more attention than Michael Jackson's death.
i just licked mashed potatoes off my blackberry. i'm not even ashamed to admit that to you.
i believe i can now do shots of gasoline with no chaser. its been that kind of summer.
I full on slapped a girl with pizza. Like in the face with sauce splattered everywhere and grease with a hard slap to the face.
We drove around last night shotting fireworks out the window while they had sex in the back of his car
Waking up at a teachers house is a very confusing thing
His brother just asked him in all seriousness if it would be cool if they became eskimo brother brothers.
I think my body knows it's dying and is just shutting down
Also we had sex while listening to fleetwood Mac on vinyl. Like the 70s called and told me to fuck off
I just used my sisters cheerleading plaque and a children's book to crush up painkillers to snort. Happy Friday
We watched ESPN, hooked up, got waffles. You know, a typical weekend.
I think I just sharted jello shots
his mom walked in while he was eating me out. and my vag was facing the door. luckily his face was in it.
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