So can I buy you a drink sometime?
Sure, but make it a double, I'm drinking for two these days.
it was like weight watchers had a halloween party.
you started puking right when a nickelback song came on..it was epic
Everything gets a little fuzzy after the flats of jello shots, but I do have a vague recollection of being at the top of a large human pyramid
he tried breathing fire using moonshine and a roman candle. would not have believed it unless i actually witnessed it.
When I take mushrooms I can feel your presence down there. I can feel where Africa is too.
they sound like some classy girls.
Hey, I don't give them daddy issues, I just take advantage of it. The real bad guy here is American parenting.
pretty sure I just came the closest to throwing up in my pants that I'm ever gonna get. I'd like to thank the academy and the hangover thatt I hope actually kills me in the morning.
Damn you and your marathon penis with its superhuman capabilities
Listen, dont tell me about your day or that your mom is in town. Don't ask me to drive you to the airport or proofread your paper. Text me when and only when you have a boner. Oh and take your pants off and leave your front door unlocked because I'm coming over.
My sex toys have been held in customs for almost a month now. They're British, what the hell?!?
If dispatch calls for us tell them I'm having a significant emotional event in the restroom
Everythings in imax form. Space oddessys are formed. Adventure at every moment and everything is epic. My mouth hass lemons. Yum.
I just saw a chick driving drinking a juice box smoking all while on the phone that is talent
The dogs decided to play a new game called "Who Can Scream the Loudest?"
I won.
Randomize
