U dropped me off n it hit me, i made it inside for exactly shit thirty on the nose, another minute n i would of had brown trowsers
i think im in love. he told me he doesnt care if i shave down there.
He told me he had more lines than a plaid shirt
you used progresso chicken soup as a mixer last night
Have you ever looked at the 750mL bottle of wine on the seat next to you knowing that it's just not going to be enough?
Each and every day.
...She then said get into the spirit and started making firecracker noises while having sex
all i know is that each time we woke up we were at a different chinese restaurant. help.
Being at this stripclub only reinforces how single I am. And I was *just* becoming okay with that.
You're the third person who's asked me for an afternoon blow connection in one day. Unreal.
That's more of a you-issue than a me-issue
I think pretend fucking a camel is a good thing to do downtown. They loved me.
He asked me how france is treating me
Tell him you got so much dick you may never come back to the US. That ought to keep him away
Just walked in on him banging another girl. He told me " sorry but I'm gonna finish now that I'm caught" ...... I think this is the reason god gave me four older brothers....
Liquor has joined the party. Aly just fucking yelled "I LOVE COOKING" and poured margarita mixer, ice and tequila into the blender.
I answered the booty call in my Trophy Wife cutoff and my ex-boyfriends sweatpants with a bottle of jager.
and how was that received?
I was simply suggesting that you really should try coke bondage sex.
Randomize