that was after robitussin, alcohol, and chocolate sauce... but before we finished pregaming
you kept yelling something about watching the muppets chirstmas carol and trying to turn the t.v. on with your car keys
It's American, baby! There ain't nothin gross about America.
fuck yea just found my unicorn costume from when i was 8... still fits
I may have discovered that porn hub is on my top visited sites during class this morning.
He did the "not my house dance." Apparently it involves spreading cereal on the floor and then grinding into the carpet in bare feet while singing "not my house" over and over and dancing.
They just showed up to the party with a shopping cart full stolen of naty ice cans, no boxes, just cans. Shit just got real !
On the plus side I'm getting really good at painting the inside of a toilet with my bowels.
Like I'm sorry but "it'll be fine trust me" IS NOT VERY REASSURING ASSHAT. Now take off your pants.
I just told a bottle to be chill
and meant it
you kept saying how you wanted to mainline bacardi right into your bloodstream. medical school is doing wonderful things to your brain
5 minutes Isn't even long enough to bring me even close to an orgasm. How selfish. Think about baseball and fuck me you idiot.
He was wearing running shoes tho. Thats like the cardinal rule. You don't fuck a guy who wears running shoes as regular shoes.
You ate my pie without asking. So don't get butt hurt if I send you link to plus size clothing stores.
It must have been good head...he put down the Xbox controller
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