Is this a definitive no? All is forlorn? Such is fine, but i'm drunk and a sucker for concrete answers
he asked me what things i liked that he did in bed, and i told him all the things i hated so he would use it on that new bitch and she wouldnt hook up with him anymore.
you for real need to get over him dude
Now that you're back together are you gonna tell him you set his stuff on fire?
These shoes are like walking on sunshine and labias. So soft and squishy
I want to break up with him.....but he has a george forman grill...like I need that
I think the pivotal moment was when we used the see and say as a drinking game with shots of whiskey. It was all downhill after that.
It's like if you got one of your titties chopped off...think of how much one would miss the other...that's how I feel when we're apart. A tit with no twin.
don't trust your eyes. just sniff them. if they smell like axe, they are broke, move on to the next.
I gave him head in my cape. On the kitchen floor. Watching a show about bacon.
You're wonderful. How are you always such a good friend?
50% genetics, 50% driven by a desire for people to drunkenly eat donuts at my funeral and then have fantastic cry-sex afterward.
How high is the bridge and how deep is the water and what are the chances I will get arrested
I need five more minutes of sobbing.. AND THEN I will get back to studying
Bank just called....we left my debit card in the ATM last night.
Haha. I found pics last week of me getting motorboated by a girl while i was taking a shot. Hahaha in my wedding dress. Classy
I think I should've done my makeup before I took the acid. Because now I just feel silly looking at myself in the mirror
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