you tried to tell me that ice cream had no calories because they were "frozen"
So let me get this straight. You would sleep with an uncircumcised guy whose name you didn't know, but you won't try the new shrimp taco from taco bell?
i can barely draw a stick figure let alone shave a heart into my pubes
There are regrets in my world today- mostly jager at that fucking altitude
The only thing in that hotel room that we didn't fuck on was the roof
Things are burning & the world smells of peanut butter. It's beautiful.
One day. I will touch his hair. I'm curious if it'll be like a soft cloud.
My neighbour is taking her hamster for a walk on a leash. Come over now
I would seriously fuck her so hard, her contacts would pop out of her eyes.
Bad Decision October is in full swing. I was telling people that "I put on eye makeup today, I'm takin' a dude home with me!".
So I found where you barfed in my house. Just wanted to let you know that my cat barfed on the kitchen floor in a show of solidarity
idk how many shots you took between 2:39 and 3:05, but your message went from "Please text me tomorrow." to "Why you sto textom?"
I always knew I would be boring and die in an Uber.
I gave him a hand job in the parking lot... now he thinks we're meant for each other...
Walk of shame through Chipotle? Check.
Randomize
