talk about how much treatments for your hpv hurts
I admire the strength of friendship we have that allows for sharing husbands.
she woke up, said "please dont tell me your name, i dont want to remember it"
He just said "wow, thats some rly nice hair! And those teeth..thosee are some cool teeth"
apparently you can't crawl through the drive-thru window
Nicee. Atleast your phone doesn't change pen in to PENISsSSSSSSS like mine does
I mean there is a rehab there so its gotta be a good time
A blind man just put his face in my cleavage. I'm also crying.
The staples of my diet are Labatt Blue, Xanax, and brick cheese.
I should have never moved out...
She shoved a hot dog in my pocket and started grinding on it.
Yeah I ended up covered in the mud by the end, in a lady bug golf cart that was blasting jazz music with a dead phone
and then at some point during the night I ended up holding a baby
Why was a baby at a karaoke bar, and were you wasted?
only slightly. thats not the point. it was a cute baby.
Well someone is clearly not winning the parent of the year award here
if it wasn’t 100% before, it is now that i will most definitely die a quesadilla related death
Underoos and an IDGAF attitude: all you need to successfully win at life
(Underoos optional)
I smell like Dick and happiness
Randomize
