You can't special order awesome
Don't fret. That vag would have consumed a lesser man.
my dad just walked in on my jacking off and all he had to say was "I thought you were bigger than that".... thanks dad.
I give you the lube, you make me the mac and cheese, that's a pretty fair deal I think.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
3 months til "no sober october" start prepping now. i cant have you bitch out on me halfway through like last year.
He's just a really nice guy who stuck his tongue in the wrong place.
Until this weekend, a man hadn't made me orgasm since the night Obama was elected. Now THAT is change I can believe in.
I would really just like to get laid somewhere that's not on a bathroom floor at this point in my life
There is someone out there for you right now. And we will find her. Or him. Her. Her, we'll start with tits.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Please don't explain what tea bagging is to my mother.
how do you politely tell someone their toddler looks alarmingly similar to the berries and cream guy
I am attempting to break the habit of calling him daddy.
I'm getting paid to get fucked up. How much better could this get?
i just cleaned my bong... I do not feel healthy
He gave me an ambien and I woke up with a raw chicken bone in my purse. I have no idea why but I hope I put it in his butt
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