At this point, I would light birthday candles in my vagina for free drinks
I felt like a body pillow being humped by a twelve year old.
you wouldnt answer to anything but devil's advocate all night.
They were lying down in the parking garage pretending to be speed bumps...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Meet me at the corner of "what the fuck" and"how'd you get in my bed" in 10 minutes.
Life gets in the way of sexy Saturday sometimes
8:30 every morning in the third floor bathroom we fuck in the handicap stall. You have your morning workout and I have mine.
Please, take the 2 shots of vodka that I left as an apologie.
I think I'm goin to jail but either way I had a blast.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
CAN I EVER JUST MAKE OUT EITH SOMEONE AND NOT GET FRIEND REQUESTED BY THEM THE NEXT DAY.
How's Vegas?
Woke up with a sculpture of my own head. Been trying to find Ashley for two days. so pretty not too bad.
HIGH AS FUCK. JUST WATCHED THE TRIPPIEST VIDEO EVER. IM NOT SCARED OF PANDAS. I GOTTA GO. TRIPPIN AGAIN
I'm so sorry for trying to eat your puzzle last night...
Must lick fork, like it's a DICK
I think the cats may be lesbians. It could just be a two hour mutual bath but it sure looks like a 69.
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