his cum shot went directly into his bellybutton. felt like i was playin ski ball
Don't you hate it when all three people suddenly sober up in the middle of a threesome. Awwwwkward.
Just spent a extra 20 minutes on the phone with the lady from unemployment talking about how to make the best brownies.
I know that was a dream because I woke up and there was no pizza
The hookers weren't a dream get tested
It's just one of those days where I'm too horny to function, to be perfectly honest.
And then we were riding the keg in the pool like an 8 second rodeo...naked.
Faking my way through an entire party as a British exchange student. Wish me luck.
Trying to roll joints on a seadoo in the middle of a lake on a windy night. -Juststonerthings
leave me alone I'm becoming one with nature and doing plant things
i accidentally gave my stepdad ketamine so id say it was a fun weekend.
Still fucking the ballerina?
She can put her legs behind her head.
Enough said
dont ever go to laser tag drunk. you will be judged.
i just want to cuddle, make out and maybe have a boob grabbed but no. someone has to have mono.
If you wear a peguin suit you MUST send me a picture!!!
You ever stub your boner? It happened to me. Just know that drugs and strip poker and a hot tub. I'll Regale you with the story over drinks later.
Randomize
