Call me "white mamba"
Your dick is not a dangerous deadly poisonous snake
It is white.
i wish i could "like" people's thoughts in real life like i can on facebook
you can....by speaking....
Today a TA in one of my classes told me he thought I was 35 and going back to school as an adult learner. Alcohol is working me.
Just got an email from TMobile. Said they were going to pursue "more qualified" candidates. So this is what rock bottom feels like.
When u wake up, don't be alarmed by the passed out mariachi band, they're cool. Muchos gracias
Driving by his house every hour is not stalking, it's a reconnaissance mission... How else can I confront him
when he pulled his cock out I told him he'd brought a knife to a sword fight
Because if not I was going to quote Ryan Lochte as punishment
Thank god I got my shit together
I blame it on the rum. It keeps jumpng doqn my throst.
Now that I'm sober, I'm realizing you put your name in my phone as "wowww"
The police report said i was screaming at someone that wasnt there, then the cops told me to call someone sober and i called mike to tell him "They are trying to arrest me for stealing information from the FBI" at that point they took me to jail.
Yes, ur purse got stole with our condo keys in it but my slut ass saved us and we had a place to stay, AND I got to choke a motherfucker while riding him. Thats taking one for the team.
i just want things to go smoothly
oh they won't lmao
My theme for the night was drink diego drink! Unfortunately Dora was not there to navigate me to the bathroom
There were a lot of gay moments in between the Strippers and coke
Randomize
