I am not hooking up with him just to see what his penis looks like.
From inside my college history class i see him waving his arms while holding a beer bong trying to get my attention
just did the walk of shame by his grandma. what the fuck is an old lady doing up at six am?
My family just suggested tequila shots. I had Vietnam style flashbacks.
no they seem fine, they're doing push ups and waiting for a charging toy helicopter
your facebook page is a work of drunk art.
Aw lol. Sounds like my masturbation injury last year
I just woke up in his house on his bathroom floor with an IV in my arm.
no, throwing your underwear at it is not the solution to everything
We need to tone down the drinking before our 7pm class. I don't remember receiving any of these handouts.
My Yoga instructor is playing the music from 'Requiem for a Dream' it makes me very reluctant to put my ass in the air
Last time he went to Europe, every time he started drinking he would wake up in a different country with no memory. There is no way he can be tour leader.
I think my body is literally trying to get me to reproduce. "fuck someone! Anyone!" - my body
my morning attempts to try to have sex with him was interrupted by the passion of the christ parade going on outside my house
If I'm not naked in the back of a cop car having sex by the end of the night, I did something wrong..
Randomize
