im letting my talent of no gag reflex go to waste
I'm watching ellen!
just because im gay does not mean you need to notify me every time you watch the ellen degeneres show
had to ask my 13 year old sister if she knew any dealers... she did. it's good to be home.
Hookup with hot guy from gym, check. Wake up to find he's peed in my closet, double check.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
It was her first time with a girl so I put on my tegan and Sara playlist to really get the full experience.
I have just two goals for this NYE. 1) get so drunk that every guy looks like Clive Owen 2) make out with as many Clive's as possible.
i'm sitting in class and looking at who would die if all the fans suddenly fell from the ceiling. i guess i have next year to pass history..
woke up outside on the porch naked surrounded by beer cans with a towl around my neck. i must be in heaven cause i've never seen this place before.
after she pushed someone down the stairs to get more vodka we lost her for a while and found her on the pole in the garage pouring water on herself
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Last night we got home from the bar and saw a fox outside and we lured it in the house with a piece of cheese. Just wanted to party with some potentially dangerous wildlife I guess.
This isn't a because its valentines day booty call, it's a because your cock is phenomenal booty call that happens to be on valentines day..
She looks like a Midwestern news anchor that got fired so she has done nothing but eat for the past 6 months.
he sent me a green and gold dick pic and advised me I needed to come drive the snake from Ireland.
Only great wives bring your dope to you when you are at the Cardiologist
Why is there a horse in the backyard?
I stayed at my gfs last night. This is all on you.
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