Thanks for last night it was amazing as always
What are you talking about
You've got to be kidding me
What the fuck I just showed up to court still drunk and the judge told me I smelled like his wife
okay serious question, the water is shut off in your house, do you attempt and use the clean toilet water for your new bong?
He had a stripper pole in his bedroom. I didn't know whether to be impressed or creeped out.
there are seriously like six guinea pigs in my bathtub right now
considering I showed up there after a xanax, 2 bottles of champagne and some coke, no shirt and someone else s husband... I'm sure you can figure that one out.
I may only be a second year med student but I feel very confident in calling that a micropenis.
Scored tix to flower show. Do we want to go drunk on Saturday or hungover on Sunday? Only two options.
I HAVE stop dating guys for their prescriptions, you have no idea how awkward family dinner was. Thank god for his xanax.
You hopped on the counter after puking, and told us you were wearing bare feet and didn't want to be alone.
Between the dance party in the car and the distraction of the momma bear and two cubs im a cops wet dream roght now when comes to wreckless driving.
The doctor said that if they accidentally damage my nerve endings I could permanently lose feeling in my lower jaw.. Honestly the first thing that came to mind was how that would affect my blowjob skills.
Back at condo with chick. What is the condom situation urgent response needed
The last time I went out with these guys I won an iced tea maker from a drag queen.
There is no rule that you can't be in a room with more than one dick that's been inside you.
Randomize
