somehow in between the body shots the bong hits and trying to convince the 7-11 lady to let me fill up my vodka bottle with cherry slurpee. i misplaced my car.
Come home. Power Hour by yourself is only fun for the first 10 minutes.
I need to stop taking drags of other peoples cigarettes, it's such a tease. Like playing just the tip, you just can't
sorry he hasn't talked to me since the surprise salvia incident...
I have bruises everywhere. I think I took "the drinks are strong" as more of a challenge than a warning.
You kept me hostage in your driveway until you got your point across that alaska has warm weather
He may only be 25% black, but after that sexual experience I am 100% never going back.
Well, remember that night we took shrooms at graces an had to leave immediately to go home and hold each other on the futon and sob for four hours? That bad...
It's a little sad/awesome that I scored coke within 60 seconds of walking in the bar.
The student becomes the teacher.
Because 9 pm Thursday you drink a loco cause you just wanna get drunk and have a good time with your friends. Then you wake up on Tuesday and you've had 17 locos and you're pregnant, lying on the side of the road, 3 states over. THAT'S why we don't have only locos parties.
Grandpa just put 6 jello shots on his plate. My aunt tried to take them away; he flipped her off. Living in the retirement home has hardened him.
I want to be tan and drunk. Is that too much to ask for?
I want Walter White to make me a bologna sandwich while I'm chained to a support
See, I'm just thinking of how...angular my room is. You probably would have sustained brain damage
No pussy. I don't care what time of year it is you do not look tough wearing sandals. Honestly you look like a high school guidance counselor.
Randomize