We made it safely. Thanks for the call though.
K got coke dick during a threesome with two strippers. Say no to drugs.
tonights recap: old cokehead freind proposed in the middle of a country bar to his trash girlfriend, saw ex-fuck who now has star shaved into his head and another with his gf, and ex-bfs best friends crackin jokes about who would fuck me first. NEVER COMING HOME AGAIN
sorry for making everyone realize you look like bruce jenner
Because ur a stupid bitch
Actually, I'm graduating from college on Saturday so that makes me a well educated bitch.
I know its only noon but, Im too drunk to hold this baby...
All he was doing was sitting in the car, staring. We asked him what was wrong and he just turned, smiled, and said "everything has its own pair of boots"
it's almost 8pm and i'm still hungover. at what point do i alert someone?
I'm gonna rob all up in that cradle
True idk how my parents didn't know I was blackout. I ate like 4 pieces of cheesecake and showed my cousins my boobs
Someone should make a valentines day card that says "I like the way you continuously consume thc with no concept of a limit other than drug supply" Because I'd send that to you.
The thing about pooping in the woods during hunting season is you never know if someone's watching you.
just saw two eagle scouts making out in chic-fil-a
how does that bad decision feel?
I just walked in on Joel doing a buck naked tripod headstand in front of the mirror so he could see the bug bite on his balls
Randomize