Liz and I are now offficially highest. OH, and your girlfriend may be a vampire. Heads up. SPARKLESSSSS
Put my glitter back.
I think I have swimmer's ear. From his tongue.
Going to pass out with da shoes on. hugging wallstreet journal from tuesday. please check me for liveliness in the morning.
I swear this girl is like a Cross between Danny Devito and Anne Heche....the Lesbian Years.
Ohhh, TODAY your worried. Becasue last weekend when we warned you about her you said "shes too hot to have herpes."
Apparently i just threw up in the bathroom, i told them i just blew my nose. i don't think they believe me...
I obviously couldn't but this on your fbook wall. I would get judge. I would willingly get tbagged by him. You can quote me on that.
He was in Alberta for less than a week and is already banned from 6 bars. I fear for his general well-being over there.
i understand you have values and thats awesome, all i want to help you do is forget about them breifly
i had a long naked conversation with the cop on why is everything fun illegal
You can jump from the roof to the pool. Trust me. I have done this before.
I just sent an "I'm sorry I forged a prescription in your name" email. It was one of the more awkward things I've done this week.
Ok, in complete transparency, I am eating a cookie on my bed naked while reading a Halo novel.
I swear I get as excited about the sound of a condom wrapper as my cat gets when she's getting a can of food.
he came with me to get plan b but they didn't have any. when I started crying he said "come on it's not that bad.. ill go get sandwiches from the vending machine and we'll have our first meal together as a family"
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