this is amzing! feels like my body is having sex with its surroundings!
We got a party bus for the nite. I found out the hard way why stripper poles are meant for girls.
I just saw at least a dozen senior citizens on roller blades. way to drunk for this.
We were naked in his bed when he asked me "what should we do?"
Since when does sleeping with your RA not result in free meal swipes? I feel so tricked...
Just had to return the shit I stole from the dining hall, with everyone watching...apparently there ARE consequences for being drunk, coked up and belligerent.
He snuck out of bed at 9 am and came back with pizza and a bottle of wine. I think I'm in love!
I don't know if I should be scared or excited that I can officially drink vodka on the rocks like it's 7up.
Are you kidding me????? How bout, IM SORRY FOR CALLING YOU 16 TIMES AND LEAVING YOU A TWO MINUTE VOICEMAIL OF MYSELF THROWING UP.
woke up with empty beer can still duct taped into my fists and the word "dove" written on the back of my neck
I wasn't even hungover I was just mourning my dignity
99% of the contents of my handbag are ketchup packets and condoms. I feel that says a lot about me as a person.
I'm not going to drink anymore, and on that note I'm not going to drink any less either, so I'll see you there. . .
Sitting naked, eating lucky charms with rain boots on
All I remember is me taking my automatic nerf gun getting on top of him and saying..."look whos in control now!"
Randomize
