You should've come with us, we're at Home Depot looking for men.
well thats why i like him. because he makes you happy. on the other hand i think he masturbates too much while texting you.
thats it. im googling how to make you boobs smaller. this is getting out of control.
How the hell can the Olympic committee frown so much on weed and yet put on a show you would have to be high to actually enjoy?
Also, just grabbed a bunch of "tuxedo black" condoms. formal, anyone?
I'm about to enter vancouver's biggest liquor store. I feel like I should sent you a "wish you were here" postcard.
I was under the impression that I sent actual words. turns out it was a series of letters and question marks on a side note we still had sex
Only she could turn her genital wart appointment into a date night.
took 4 advil with a shot of vodka, figure i'd try to save myself now
he said he wished i had balls so he could kick me in them. then we had sex obviously
Her ass is the reason I still believe in a higher power
My sister just showed me a snap chat that I don't remember sending, it was a picture of me with two big macs in my bra with just the words "BURGER TITS"
Hey it's Males-You-Probably-Wish-You-Hadnt-Had-Sex-With Monday. MYPWYHHSWM
I told him to send me a dick snap for my birthday. To personalize it, he drew a candle coming out of the tip of it so I could blow it out.
I just bout myself an edible arrangement for myself and had it delivered to work. I even wrote myself a note. This is a new low for me.
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