I must say, I don't like the act of throwing up, but the feeling after is quite delightful
Come over! I've just turned Titanic into a drinking game. I drink every time I want to fuck Leonardo DiCaprio.
Her underwear doesnt even match. If youre going to be a face book whore at least have matching shit.
Threw up 3 times on the lawn mower and then proceeded to crash it into a tree root and break it.
just heard this guy tell a story about how he got boat head. i want his life
You know it's been a rough year when your therapist mouth is just wide open. And I didn't even get to the real issue!
hey the jello shots wont freeze
How much Everclear did you put in them?
uhhh all of it
I didn't want to have shaved for no reason, so I told him I'd blow him if he would just come over and appreciate the smoothness of my legs.
These muscle relaxers obviously don't work because I'm harder than a fucking diamond.
I want you more than I want a burrito.
I'm not as filling.
my extended weekend of being as irresponsible as possible started with blowing the bartender in the bar bathroom. off to a good start.
Oh, btw, UPS might come by. Drunk me ordered us $75 worth of gummy airhead starburst type candies. Whatever it is, it'll be delicious.
I'm not well. Although it could be worse.
My cousin is so hungover she quit her job.
how do i act around someone who's shoes i puked in while naked and blackout?
Walking actually physically hurts. We should do it again some time.
Randomize