Yeah, we realized keeping you in a cage wasn't beneficial to us
I have my period so I felt bad and blew him with cash cab in the background. I wanted to yell out the answers but my mouth was full.
god I hate her. why can't she just fuck and leave like a normal slut.
currently hungover, lying in bed and cutting cheese with my drivers license. ashamed? not even a little bit.
woke up with the bag of wine duct taped to my shoulder.
good news: I made it out of bed and into shower. Bad news: I made it back to bed without clothes. Worse news: I don't know this bed.
Even though we had just had to physically take her off of someones lawn she was peeing on when they came outside, she still insisted on walking unassisted the rest of the way home. It was dignity meets shit show.
So a sorority girl just introduced herself to me by saying "a guy I used to fuck just threw up on me" and then she grinded on me
Nope. Too hot. We just sat in my tub with cold water spraying on us drinking coronas. This summer heat is killing my libido slowly
May the one with the liver that just won't quit win
I'm drunk, we're losing, and I'm in the visitors stands. This is about to get ugly.
I slept with someone only because he got my Simon Birch impression. It was a new low.
They were so huge my eyes were just drawn to them. Boob gravity man.
Twist to Josh's story, he had a gyro in his hand and never dropped it even after he got knocked the fuck out
We just catapulted a jelly bean off of his hard dick into his mouth.......Happy Easter!
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