My low point of the night was when my roommate spit out her jello shot and i took it...
She was singing my heart will go on into her barf bag. celine aint got shit on her.
We gave a starfish gin and Lucky Charms. I think it enjoyed it. Best trip to the beach ever.
It was mandatory to shotgun a beer before we were allowed to eat dinner
stumbled upon a picture of an owl staring me in the face. i almost offered him a bong hit.
You rode him down the last flight of stairs like a human sled.
On that note I give you a 10 for sticking the landing and staying on the whole ride.
Please tell me there isn't another video of me on the toilet...
No really tho I'm wearing a chucky cheese shirt and yoga pants. If that doesn't scream no sex idk what does
Life just isn't the same without him waking me up at 4 in the afternoon with a look of pity on his face...
We may have picked the wrong resort. Brenna and I have already been propositioned for swinging twice and we've only been here 3 hours
I'm not going to pass up the opportunity to be half naked and covered in glitter without facing judgement or legal prosecution. I'll be there.
All I know, is I had green sex and beer and got driven home. That's it.
I'm spending my Sunday wishing the entire Patriots offense would let me touch their manhood
HOLY FUCK i just remembered we had bows and arrows and firecrackers last night
and flaming arrows and vodka
how did we not set your garage on fire
It’s the universal cock block of this decade
FUCK THE COCKBLOCK 19
Randomize
