what's Bukake?
a bad idea.
when my dick couldnt get hard she said "fly on little wing"
Just got tipped $5 for distracting some dude's gf while he got another girl's number. Bro-code at its finest.
This is breast cancer awareness month... The least we can do is give a stripper some singles.
Her Grandmother felt me up AND paid for dinner. If she doesn't get her shit together I'm gonna be her Step Grandfather.
The toilet wouldn't flush at the club so I literally just shat in the garbage.
Just shaved my crotch so I could call it the bald eagle. Happy 4th.
When i said i was brazilian i swear to god he started to tear up
I fucked him twice and then he set me up with his teammate. This kid does wonders for me
I just spent so much time grooming my landing strip and like, sex isn't even on the agenda tonight.
Do you think this 2 hour Amazon delivery thing works on vibrators? Cause that would be clutch
Harry Potter pub crawl tonight. You know you're living your life right when your check list for the evening is wizard robes, wand and acid.
It's not a walk of shame if you run
I yelled at him as he left "you broke up with me. You lost your blow job privileges"
only i would get cock blocked by a cop
Randomize
