He just screamed at her, "if you pass out i am still having sex with you!!!" In front of the entire party.
you jizzed all over me and yelled "makeover"
There was a picture of him proposing on the night stand and their dog watched, but I can't help myself, his dick is just so perfect.
if that blanket by the dog bowl was your dog's "bed" then i apologize to bailey for having sex on it
I wore my front clasp bra so he would have to prove his sobriety to me before we had sex.
dude chill. we stole 18 hamburgers from her house
no. you cant fuck a burger.
My mom is holding a picture of me, crying, and saying "where did I go wrong" over and over again.
got high to the hills theme song. FEEL THE RAIN ON YOUR SKIN. no regrets.
I hear sloppy seconds go great with fried rice
pretty sure the dicks i sucked were punishment enough
The kind of drunk where you put two tampons in thinking that it'll last me longer ...
So he just rolled you off his dick and fell on the floor?
Why can't I come over and snuggle you and make you lick my boots
He's ruined me. Do you know how frustrating it is to know I'll never find another guy as tall and handsome and rich with as big of lips & booty, and cock as him who also rims and takes me on tropical vacations and buys me all the cocaine.
I just saw a girl on the phone crying and eating a sandwich. Thats talent right there.
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