Is it weird that I think of Ennis from Brokeback Mountain everytime I hear "Make em Say" by Master P? "I don't need your money. Huh." NA NA NA NAAA.
Mental picture: Us at a bar keeping it classy shot gunning PBR's in the corner.
That was a good example of when keeping it real goes right
gettin pulled by a cop with a camera crew. gonna flee. want my 15 min of fame on cops.
Lauren will drop me off I'll be drunk ride you for a little bit and then you can go to sleep
sorry. that wasn't for you
Is it weird that I found myself thinking of that blue chick from Avatar while she gave me head after the movie?
Dude its barely eleven am and there is already a firetruck and ambulance at the shamrock...happy st paddys day
Her inability to understand the word "moderation" is the achille's heel of an otherwise perfect human
Reached a new low. Drinking Wine from my thermos while on the stair master.
I'm going to go out on a limb and say last night was a success, also the neighbors are counting down the days until we move out.
He unbuckled his belt, tipped his hat at me, then told me to "saddle up"
this is like your 5th cowboy right? where do you keep finding these guys?!!
Well don't pass out under a Swedish flag and people won't make assumptions
Oh great. I guess I'm second on that list now that we've confirmed she's not a lesbian AND that was her sister.
It's not safe here. I had urgent and violent diarrhea last night, and I got blackout drunk. Please don't come over.
I fucked R2D2 last night. I consider Star Wars day a success.
I didn't think you were that drunk until you were trying to rub your foot on my vag under the table at the thai place.
Randomize