I bought a boat. Want to have sex on The Angry Clam? That's what I named it.
and then he said that the only reasonable explanation as to why I got swine flu was because all I ever do is join the bandwagon
shes a baton twirler.. i expected her to be better with her hands.
Blonde 1 is sitting on the floor crying and blonde 2 is asleep with her face in the toilet. This isn't what I had in mind when they asked me back
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Dude give me 4 good reasons we shouldn't trade girlfriends tonight
It's 4th of July all over again, we were chasing with the pool water.
I spiked my fruit smoothie. Taking bikini season diet to a whole new level
she screamed "gravy"!!! in the guys face and then stole the very large mans food in line ahead of us... that was just the beginging of the police report.
Learned a valuable life lesson last night. It's titled "Tequila: Still A Bad Idea".
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
after tonight, seriously nothing could taste better than toothpaste
Fair enough. Everyone has some guilty pleasures. Yours is yourself
Sexting across continents is really a perfect example of how far technology has come.
Bro i pulled the fucking willy wonkas gold ticket of ratchets the other night this chick was a real treat god bless her
She just kept roaring and saying Katy Perry had nothing on her. Wtf did she take?
I’m not dating him for his personality. I’m dating him so I can steal his dog.
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