no morals, dignity, or self respect ... just an empty condom wrapper and a facebook request
being alone eating nachos and drinking from a giant munchen beermug really isnt that sad
How many folks do you know who bring coke to a dinner party. Seriously.
btw im making up a story about these stitches..... i think a hockey stick to the face sounds better then i fell up the stairs
U thinks that's bad? He told me that he had to envision high school wrestling in order to bust a nut with some girl
University has ruined us all. I just had to clarify the last time I had sex as "No, not at the party we crawled home from in the snow. It was the one where you puked off the balcony and hit the barbecue."
idk. a stripper just bit me. I'm so disoriented
don't worry, i'm not mad. i'm just angry. and furious. and about to set your ass on fire.
Why can't you just come over, fuck me, then leave so i can get stoned and watch law and order?
I masterbated poison ivy onto my penis, it hasn't been this upset with me since the Take one for the team fiasco of 02.
I'm basically the yoda of knowing when someone wants to sleep with you
I'm bleeding and have questions
For the love of god, if any of you are up, bring me pants.
Vodka, MiraLAX and Gatorade are perfect for the night before a colonoscopy
SOOOOOO I just attempted to go to the gym, hungover. Ended up throwing up in the bathroom. I hope people think I'm just working out really hard
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