is it wrong that I prefer my women with low self esteem and a smidgen of an eating disorder?
Ha i know. My vag can't go too crazy for a boy halfway across the country. It doesn't have that good of range
I just want to hang out with her.
You're a liar. Why do I have to give you reasons you can't have sex with my mom? I hate you.
You were with some girl. Your exs best friend. Your shirt was half undone and she was telling you to put your penis away. It wasn't out but you wanted to. Patron is your weaknes.
No. I'm laying on the floor naked. I almost made it to the shower
This could be the definition of living by yourself
Pretty sure the shower sex fucked up my hip alignment... im walking like im 104 today
I think I just danced on the bar. With a man named Alabama.
Thank you for turning 21. I'm going to love reading your texts.
omg this is getting ridiculous. nobody's vagina should ever be this neglected.
I can't take my grandparents out somewhere where I've fucked half the staff.
I'd help you out but I got Bacardi and Tequila poured down my snorkel last night and I'm still drunk
Thanks for launching me off you reverse cowgirl. I think I chipped a tooth.
you can't get cum all over my hair and then tell me you just want to be friends
tbh I think I just dated him for his dogs in the first place.
he just fucked me for my cheese.
They left a cherry picker with the keys in it on a college campus, what else were we supposed to do?
Randomize
