I don't make mistakes...just understandable bad choices.
yah I made NO friends last night. at one point i think i replaced talking with spitting
I am solely responsible for the birth of their child. I mean, I did push them into the room and hold the door shut yelling "punch that kitty!". It has to be a sign.
you're just mad cause i madeout with you while having a mouth full of chewed pretzels
all of the sudden, the other guy at the bar who was celebrating his birthday got a super inspired look on his face and then screamed at me ''our parents fucked on the same day!''
some chick tossed a drink in your face at the bar last night. your mouth was opened so i think you ended up swallowing at least half of it. good job.
Man, I want to make his penis a sandwich.
when the repo soundtrack came on in the middle of us having sex i realized it was about time that i clear out my itunes library
She's running around the streets punching people and narrating. I don't know whether to laugh or stop her
I felt like I was selling my soul to satan but then I realized I already pawned it for drug money
I AM A SEXUAL NIGHTMARE
Two of the boys I banged while living in that house are about to move into it hahhaaha
ABOUT TO MAKE THE BIGGEST MISTAKE OF MY LIFE, SEND HELP
Have fun and good luck.
The guy got mobbed on, all hell broke loose. About 20 cops showed up, and this kid somehow convinced a cop that letting him pee in front of him is justifiable. This guy could sweet talk Hellen Keller, he was THAT good
How do I let my trainer know I'm only at the gym so I can get in more intense sex positions?
Randomize
