He told me he could read braille... with his tongue. So I took him home. I don't think he was lying
No subtext here. People are naked.
its preseason football. its like non alcoholic beer. who gives a fuck
Just abandoned him for a bowl of soup and the living room floor...hope the window replacement guys don't get a show..I miss you!
We would have taken you home with us, but you were outside the bar measuring a randoms stream of piss by walking along side it... you said you were only at 32 feet and it still had a couple of grooves to hit.
Second wind. Either that or my heart is about to explode. I'm hoping the first one.
KEG. KEG. THE OPERA HAS A KEG. KEG STAND IN A TUX. AFTER PARTY RAVE AND KEG STANDS.
I do have a life. It just consists of making scarves and chesse straws now
We have started to decorate penises.
I let that bitch know in no uncertain terms I was taking the coke dealer in the breakup
Broeke and glass. I feel so and. Appilogixe in morbing.
Ok, now help me add to my topless picture collection, i'm going to make myself a calendar
I thought you couldn't go near Germans after that restraining order
Can you send me the picture you took of me smoking a joint with the cat make-up on?
Just because you can't have him, doesn't mean you can have his brother.
What about the best friend?
Randomize
