I'll show rhose boucners: You don't let me in, I poop on your pool.
yup, got lost on my way to the final. maybe i should have gone to this class all semester
No. I do not want to discuss your lesbian tendencies with my sister.
She still started it.
Tell me you didn't have sex with my dad.
googling pictures of Lindsey Lohan so that I know what to wear to court is definitely a low point in my life
I just told the joker that my vagina is the bat cave and he needs to infiltrate it.
Just saw a dude take a shot in the parking lot in his car. Too early in the semester for that
He kept kissing me on the cheek when I was pretending to sleep while he cried
Right now you and beer are my only friends.
CALL ME OLD FASHIONED BUT PEE IS FOR TOILETS
unless you want this visit to have a different tone... more romantic, less molly in a hotel room
I bet I give better head than any other PTA mom.
I think I'm so comfortable in my sexual relationship because he mostly wants to see me naked with large plates of bacon tastefully placed upon my body
Do you think it would be okay if i cleaned my cartilage piercing with the leftover vodka?
I would give away three of my own ribs to be able to eat myself out.
...ew
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