Is this going to be a big send off or a somber occasion? Just need to know if I should start drinking on the train or not.
I just saw a stripper wear a tube top around her floppy gut. God bless Michigan.
did he really ask u insert a warm banna in ur anal?
he wanted to have me eat skittles off of his body. he mad gay sex even gayer.
My dealer, who also happens to be a male stripper, just invited me to watch him perform tonight. Boundaries buddy, boundaries.
She said she didn't want me watching her give me a bj, so she proceeded to make a "blowjob igloo" out of blankets...
Apparently the last thing they remember of me was me stumbing into a bathroom, then falling out 5 minutes later clutching a butter knife repeating "ketamine goes in my face hole"
I full on slapped a girl with pizza. Like in the face with sauce splattered everywhere and grease with a hard slap to the face.
I'm finding that as the end of the quarter approaches, the list of things I refuse to do sober keeps getting longer.
You were so excited to be getting 4 tickets to the Whale Rodeo.... That high
Sorry I invoked the "everyones getting smacked including myself policy last night"
Just an FYI if we break up I'm going to sleep with your cousin or who ever my dealer is.
I woke up and found piles of popcorn in a trail around my house, ending at a laundry basket full of pillows. What were we trying to catch last night?
Oh, I also stabbed a guy Friday and he still asked me out
Doing shots with my high school valedictorian. Bucket list
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