you dont need to remember merediths name haha. only jane
Reason #437 to hate Louisiana: Just went to the public bathroom at work. It was so humid the toilet seat was damp and sticky. Either it's the humidity or I sat in somebody's yesterday piss. I choose to believe the humidity.
I just woke up. In the port-o-potty next to our tailgate. an hour after the game started. explain.
his tattoo said carpe diem which i thought was ironic considering his epilepsy
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just added God to my list of friends who can only see my limited profile on facebook. its such a relief to know that He can't watch me fuck up my life anymore.
The plus side of face planted at the tailgate was that no one could see my nipples hanging out.
I DON'T CARE WHAT THE CIRCUMSTANCES ARE NEVER VOMIT IN MY PURSE AGAIN.
Doing blow at 6am to "wake myself up for clinicals" was a baaaaad idea
Im drinking in homer but I guess Egan got arrestest on an "assault by water ballon" charge but tom actually threw the water balloon in question at the bartender.
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Also, I threw up on the playground again. I've honestly had more fun there this past summer than I did in my entire childhood.
She called me her guardian angel after I picked her phone up from the river of pee coming from her front porch.
When I took off my jeans he became more excited about my Elmo underwear than sex but to be fair, who can blame him. They're awesome undies.
All three of my roommates have their significant others over. We're all hanging out in the living room. It's like I'm the trifecta of third-wheeling
You meet the best people naked in a hot tub at 2 am.
I'm going to confession for the first time in 6 years. Where do I start, the gay sex or rampant alcoholism?